No, I did not attend a service this morning. I wanted to, but there wasn't room in my schedule. Isn't that somewhat indicative of our need for Lent? I find there is so little time for anything, including God, and that is frightening. The reality of God's vastness is somehow hidden--perhaps it would be more honest to say that I hide myself from God's vastness-a moment here, an hour there, an entire day/week/month... Which brings me to the Garden. Eden. When man and woman were hiding from God's vastness--in the middle of His vastness. Which is what we all do, really. We hide from the Truth of the universe, hiding among the very Truth we wish to avoid. The only person we are really hiding from is ourselves. The God of the Garden, the God of Truth--knows all, sees all, LOVES all. Yet we hide because in our pride and striving after God-ship--we see perfection as our redemption, not relationship. We hide because we are afraid of what we will see when we look at ourselves. If we keep our haughty chins up, we don't have to look down at the disgusting nakedness of our arrogance. Lent for me is a chance to remove the "leaves and branches" of the garden that I have surrounded myself with to hide from God and myself.
I have many things to do today--including:
- research for professor
- check request/reconciliation for department
- return flash drive to church office
- procure snack for tonight's symphony rehearsal
- which just reminded me that I left my violin at home (curses!)
- copy songs for paid birthday party next Tuesday
- call and inquire after keyboard for above party
- work on homework
- call wife regarding scheduling
- practice the non-existent violin and be ready for rehearsal
My goal today is to stay out in the open as much as possible. Hopefully, when I check back in, I will have found a violin, practiced...
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